After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
