can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Randomize
