David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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