clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
