dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
