Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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