Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
