They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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