This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
