She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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