My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
