can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
