We're facebook friends in real life
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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