thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize