Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

he told me I talked like a deaf person

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(256): View more from Alabama

that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on

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(256): View more from Alabama

Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.

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(517): View more from Michigan

drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea

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(847): View more from Illinois

I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.

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(425): View more from Washington

You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...

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