What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize
