Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
