You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize