what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
