Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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