I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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