Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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