ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize