Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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