thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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