I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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