Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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