Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
