I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Randomize
