I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
