yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
