I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
