I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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