There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
You took a bar mat shot.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
