Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Randomize
