Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I need water and some morals
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
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