oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
he was CRYING into my vagina
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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