yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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