Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
They have beer where we have blood.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Damn victory sex feels great
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize