i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
