I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Randomize
