So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize