i don't like sucking hair
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize