problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
