So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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