Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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