She's JV to your varsity
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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