Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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