can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
