Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize