It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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